micro

Talked with dad today as our weekly call and he immediately drew a comparison of Rahul vs Harris and how they are alike and how they can’t stand up to people like modi and trump. I cut the call said goodbye and hung up. I am not ready to have convos about election with him right now.

I joined our internal politics channel after the elections and a lot of chatter going on post elections. It’s truly been eye opening for me to hear from so many people who voted Trump on why they did and what could have democrats done better. Wished I had joined earlier. Lots of civil discussion.

Writing a random draft of what *I* think democrats should start doing more but I am going to be vilified for saying so I dont know if I should publish the post lol.

I finally talked to that ex colleague of mine who voted for Trump in California. It was a refreshing chat on why he indeed voted Trump after voting democrats for last 4 cycles. Yesterday I talked to my sister in Michigan who cannot vote (well not even GC yet) and she was like why were you even shocked?! She was like we went to his rally last month for funsies sake and came out convinced he was winning it so they had already made their peace with it. It’s revealing how much I lived in a bubble last 4 years ooof.

Checked out early from work today and took a big nap. Much needed after this week.

8 years ago I had a POC manager. The day after election the mood in office was crestfallen and visibly shook. Our POC manager pulled each one of us aside for 1:1 to check on us, how we are doing, and reassure us that he would also have our back. In my current team I report to a white man (supposedly Trumpkin, can’t confirm). We had an off-site this week which was held on Wednesday, and pretty much entire team reporting to him are east coast / west coast liberals who have no issue talking about our politics internally. Majority of us were feeling sunk on Wednesday morning. Because the off-site was virtual, everyone was off-camera. Our manager forced us to come on camera because it was an off-site, even after a few women protested and told him upfront it was not a good day for them to be on. He forced them and us anyway. A few people pinged me on the side how they were crying in the morning and had to just turn on camera. A few more simply said no and never came on camera. I did because I wanted the team to see how crestfallen I was and it showed. So yeah, when I posted yesterday about changing my teams and specifically looking for POC manager and POC chain, thats why. I am actually convinced at this point, I will barring a white peerson I actually know personally well enough and vouch they got my back (and I do know a few).

Phone-screened a candidate few days ago and decided not to move ahead. Candidate finds me on LinkedIn and sends me a 2 page email on why I made a mistake with tons of examples and notes on why the candidate is the BEST choice for me. Look, I appreciate the diligence and going out of way, but your opportunity to impress me has passed. This is not a sales role, and if I am not going to give you extra points for your push.

An interesting mind shift for me already since yesterday is as I am looking around to change teams within the company I am now paying more attention to if my leadership chain at least 2-3 levels up is white or POC, and I dont think at this point I can blame myself for looking for team & manager that’s run by POCs because I think thats the only way to feel… safer?

One of the big outcomes for me personally after this week is to trust my gut more than data and anecdotes. I knew this would happen, I just did not want to admit it that it could happen. Another is to take *less* interest in politics than before because it’s causing serious mental health issues for me, and I must be focussed on my personal health and family over anything else, because as white Americans and a good majority of other POC told us, its profit over lives. So yeah I plan to reduce my political interest in the next several months. No more stressing around my friends here on whom they should vote for. They got eyes, they can very well research. It’s distressing when a few people ping you after the election and ask *”what is project 2025? I know you sent something before but I ignored it. I just voted whoever you told me to man”*. I dont deserve to carry the burden and stress of informing people around me because the are living a chill life and I am not. So yes I am going to start focusing on I, me, myself more than try to save something that I know (trusting my gut) Americans dont want saving.

For the last several years I have actively discouraged friends and family from moving to the USA. My sole advice to my cousins and aspiring nephews to migrate for jobs or masters has been to reconsider and either go somewhere else or stay put in India. I and my friends often talk about that if we were 22 today none of us would have considered coming here for a better future. Today I am vindicated because I did the right thing for all of them. My advice to my remaining cousins in USA is going to be the same – if they don’t have kids or young kids, and are in visa/GC queue – leave.