I usually dont watch shows like “Extreme Makeover” and crap, but somehow without anything to do in the evening eventually led me to watch tonight’s episode. With options of watching Baseball on one channel, NFL on other, and yet another suspense drama on other, Extreme Makeover felt like a better option of all. All I wanted was to pass away some time, and least I expected out of it was to be moved and sent back to my college days; and that is what exactly happened after watching it.
Tonight’s episode was focused on a family with a disabled kid. This disabled kid was glued to the wheel chair all the time he was not lying on the bed. His body was fragile, he couldnt talk and he had a waistband to support his spinal cord. If he was not lying on his bed, he was glued to his wheel chair – and his parents had to lift him up and put him on his wheelchair, dress him, shower him, make him eat; almost as if a second individual lived his life. Basically he was a living vegetable.
Yet, there was this unmistakable look in the eyes of this kid that showed his will to live, and will to live it fully. He had a constant smile on his genuine face, that almost made me overlook his disability. Extreme Makeover did do a extreme makeover of his family’s house, but what remained with me after the show was just his mom, and the kid. His mom was overwhelmed by the life she had led for him for 14 years, and the kid had responded back with a will to live it all, despite his incapacity to enjoy it fully.
I dont know why, but this reminded me of a mother-daughter pair from back in college (masters degree). When we first began, I use to see this woman always pulling or pushing a girl’s chair towards different classes. The girl was in the same state as the boy I saw on television – she was immobile, and constantly on the wheel chair, with her head tilted to one side. She could barely talk, and almost spoke in just hand gestures. I had always thought why I ran into them so many times. Though I never spoke to them throughout my master’s I was anyways intrigued by them.
Over the next few months in college, I had gathered that it was actually the girl who was studying in our college towards a degree. But she neither had the capacity to write down notes, or walk. Hence her mother did it for her. She accompanied her disabled child to each class, and both of them would listen to the professor and take down notes. I had often wondered if she even gave exams, or if her mother did the surrogate job of appearing exams for her. I never figured that one out, and my best educated guess was she was exempted from examinations, or if any there was a very liberal policy for her. But even then, it was not about academics that had struck me. It was simply her will to learn, be educated in life that had struck a chord; and her mother who so diligently supported.
Perhaps the fact that she could hear the professor was all that she needed to have the will to learn. For all I know, she could have never been in any capacity to work, but maybe the joy of learning inspired her will to join college. Over time, she just faded into yet another student category for me. Initially every time I used to see her, I would keep thinking about her for a while, but as time passed by, it also faded. A cursory mental thought about her was all I could afford later on whenever I saw her. Eventually I moved on.
Today, I went back to memories of that girl, after watching the show. I wonder if she ever finished her degree. I wonder where is she now. How is she. How is her mother. Who was her father anyways – I never saw him in college. What was the field in which she did her degree in. Sadly, I did none of this.
And it wouldnt have been difficult striking a conversation with her mother if I had tried. They were afterall, Indian.